Monday, August 30, 2010

It's a freebie but only after you take that whore bath

Here's the ceramic pitcher...

Homegirl! extra

They went to the bar and they sat in a row, Engagedguy, Egyptiantatts, Homegirl, and Punkboy. Engagedguy and Egyptiantatts’d rode their motorcycles over while Punkboy’d walked his fixie besides Homegirl the ten blocks to the dive bar, and Punkboy’d thought about kissing her the whole way. First, he thought, I will kiss her on the end of this block. Then he thought, I will kiss her on the top of this hill. Then, I will kiss her after pointing out the house I used to rent that’s now owned by a po-po. Then, I will kiss her when we get within two blocks of the bar. Then, I will kiss her if a hoopdie goes by bumping its system. Then, I will kiss her if a hoopdie prowls by quiet as sin. Then, I will kiss her before we get into sight of the bar. Then, when I can see the bar. Then, before we walk into the bar.

He didn’t, but he told her to wait as he locked up his bike, then opened the door for her to the bar.

That was more than enough for Homegirl, the holding open of the door for her, but she didn’t tell Punkboy that. If he’d pursued it that night, she would have gone home with him, cos she kinda had a feeling about him way down deep.

& those are the feelings more people should listen to.

I’m just saying.

But Punkboy didn’t pursue it that night.

& Egyptiantatts did.

& Homegirl and Etatts were a secret couple for a while.

But, just a couple of weeks; Etatts loved himself way too much.

& they weren’t that secret cos Punkboy knew. & Punkboy was pissed.

At both of them.

It took him a long time to get over it.

About three years, maybe more. But, this was supposed to be about Homegirl and Punkboy and how they got together.

After the failed group date, they made out a couple months later. Punkboy was walking Homegirl home from the café’s yearly Labor Day picnic and they were wasted and they were standing on top of that hill where Punkboy’d wanted to kiss Homegirl at before and it was still warm outside and quiet, the hoopdies were prowling like sin, and it was perfect and they kissed with tongue and didn’t bite, at first, it was gentle gentle as they got to know each other’s tongues, as they felt the slippery twistings and turnings, and then they were biting and teeth meeting and clicking hungry but not in a bad way and there was some scratching and pressing and panting and then they decided to go to the bar where they met up with their co-workers and pretended like the make-out on the hill’d never happened.

They pretended for a while.

Punkboy started dating another chick from the café and Homegirl took up with this younger guy who’d just gotten hired and she started feeling some things for him and then she went to Montreal with a friend and when she got back Youngboy was dating someone else and Homegirl was pissed and pretended like she didn’t care about Youngboy and his little bitch and Punkboy and his.

That weekend, tho, she went out to the dive bar Punkboy hung out at and he was there and Etatts was there and Engagedboy and her fave bartender was bartending and Etatts and her fave bartender were now roommates and they decided to have an afterbar and Homegirl had nowhere to go but home so she went to the afterbar and Punkboy had nowhere to be except his girlfriend’s bed so he went to the afterbar and Etatts and Favetender lived there and Engagedboy went home cos he knew better. Some other people were there when Homegirl showed up with one of her convenient girlfriends and she ditched girlfriend in the living room and friend didn’t notice cos she was concentrating on the bong that was going around and all of a sudden Punkboy and Homegirl were in the dirty months-o-afterbars kitchen and they were alone and they were kissing again like they were at the top of that hill and then Punkboy said, You wanna go?

Yours w/ the towel,


  1. Anonymous9/01/2010

    I love the dynamic between Punkboy and Homegirl so much. I got sucked in when I saw you on S.S.F. and cant get enough of those two.

  2. Yeah, i like them better than bradgelina or kim kardashian & whoever & that just reveals my uber-lack of pop culture knowledge... Thanks for liking Punkboy & Homegirl cos they're good peeps way downdeep.